Responses to questions I have been asked about the COVID-19 pandemic.
Borderline women often end up with narcissistic men. But they feel overpowered and overwhelmed in these relationships as the narcissist leverages his cold empathy to push all their buttons cruelly and repeatedly until they are triggered badly, decompensate, and act out. The Borderline partner often claims that the narcissist “made her misbehave” in dramatic or histrionic ways, drove her crazy, and that his very presence bothered her, that “he was too much and everywhere”.
The narcissist’s strong and ubiquitous personality compels the Borderline to test boundaries and to mock or challenge his omniscient bloated self-importance.
The narcissist is perceived by the Borderline as a Father figure, or even, in moments of diffusion and dissociation, as an actual father. The narcissist wants to possess the Borderline, reduce her to a mute witness of his grandeur, and transform her into a mere function or extension. This extended mistreatment provokes in the Borderline (often a secondary psychopath herself) reactance and defiance, a re-enactment of a teenage rebellion.